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Thursday, May 30, 2013

So....um.....hi?

Okay so I've been AWOL for a while.  If you read my last post, you'll see that I've become a graduate student.  Oh.My.Goodness.  What began as a 1 year program has quickly morphed into two years because I could not handle daily life and 2 graduate level courses every 8 weeks.  Now that I'm doing 1 course every 8 weeks, I can actually find time to breathe.  No time to read what I want to read but breathing is a good...

This is probably the most hectic week of my life.  Or at least it feels as such.  Caris' first dance recital is Friday and Saturday, her birthday party is Saturday, and we leave for Florida on Monday.  My house is a wreck, I've not made anything for her party, our yard is a jungle, and I'm still packing for Florida.  I like to call it organized chaos.  BUT.....this time next week we will be at Disney World!!  To say that I am excited is the understatement of the year, and between you and me, my mind is already there.  Caris is excited and is ready to be immersed into everything princess, and Dave is ready to....well...I guess get on a plane for the first time!  He's been informed that he cannot show fear as this will completely freak out Caris- Daddy is afraid of NOTHING.  Thankfully, it's two 1 hour flights with an hour between and not hours long.

I am ready to just be away...which sounds bad but I really don't mean like that.  I love my life, but a little down time in the sun never hurt anyone, right?

I'm going to attempt to post about our days in Florida as sort of a travel blog, but I may end up using Tumblr.  I say this never really using Tumblr, so add that to my list of things to do before we leave.  There's Wi-Fi on the plane, so surely I can learn how to use a completely different social media platform in two 1 hour flights?


Saturday, September 1, 2012

So I'm back...for a bit...

So yeah, I've been gone awhile from this blog.  But, in my defense, I've accomplished quite a bit.  I know have the coveted bachelors degree, and am currently a graduate student in a nonprofit leadership development program.  But, that is not the reason for my resurgence to the blog world.

It's politics, plain and simple.

Before we begin, let's get some things out there.  Firstly, I am NOT a republican, and couldn't be paid enough to be one.  Secondly, I don't feel very liberal, but many would say that I am.  If so, that's fine with me.  Thirdly, my perspective is not the same as yours, so please remember that.

I actually watched part of the RNC last week...why I'm not sure, but it was on, and I watched.  Although, I will admit Romney's speech put me to sleep.  That could explain some of dreams from that night...but I digress....

While I do not agree with bringing spouses into the mudslinging that the parties do, I have some opinions about Ann Romney that I'd like to share.  First, I firmly believe she has no idea what it's like to wonder where your next meal is coming from.  Having to eat tuna and pasta means you CAN eat, unlike others who can't even afford the 50cent can of tuna.  Now, this being said, I've never been in this situation, but I know those who have.  Ann Romney has never been in this position.  They may have started out modest, but they had wealthy families to fall back on.  Many people do not, and have to make it or end up homeless.  It's a fact of life that Ann Romney will never experience.  While I thought her speech was good, it in no way will EVER make me believe she can relate to the poor of this country.  Neither can Mittens either....  This was an attempt by the Romney campaign to make voters believe they can relate.  It also means they believe the majority of Americans are stupid.

There's a disturbing trend going on right now trying to define rape.  You'll notice the majority of politicians who are trying to define rape are male.  It infuriates me that some politicians claim that rape can be legitimate or not.  How the hell would they know?  I refuse to allow laws to made in this country that would keep a woman from seeking an abortion in the event of rape or incest.  It's simply unfathomable that in this century women are still fighting for the right to make decisions about her own body.  These movements, of course, are mostly led by men who will never have to worry about whether the rape they just went through will end in pregnancy.  Selfish, ignorant bastards!

Some of you may be thinking right now that I'm completely off my rocker here, but you couldn't be further from the truth.  For the first time in many years, I've discovered my true stance on things.  I've found my fit, you could say.  Call me a feminist-- I will embrace the title gladly.  I will lobby, debate, and argue, as long as it means that my little girl and all girls out there can keep the right to make decisions about their own body.  I refuse to let a male politician, who does not know me from Adam, try to tell me what I can and cannot do to my body.  We're a far cry from the time of women being nothing more than dirt on a man's shoe.

I could foray into religion at this point, but I won't.  Let's just take a look at history in regards to women's rights....

So yes, politics has brought me back to the blog.  It won't happen often, as time simply does not permit.  But, if you follow me on facebook, you'll definitely be seeing more political posts.  It's that time of year!!!

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Some decisions.....

After the mess this week was, I've come to some decisions about the future.

We are not getting a new dog any time soon.  We still miss Blitzen terribly, and every morning I hear her nails clicking on the kitchen floor.  I'm not ready for a new dog, and neither is Dave.

Over the last year, I've pinned by sense of accomplishment on graduating from college with honors.  I found out earlier this week that the GPA I had been going off of is not what is considered for honors.  My transfer grades take me below 3.5, and out of honors range.  After a nearly hysterical fit, where I cried in frustration for about an hour and was basically unwilling to discuss the situation with anyone, I came to a conclusion.  My graduating without honors is no reason to need a hefty dose of Xanax.  The accomplishment of graduating college isn't about honors, it's about getting through my degree and calling myself a college graduate.  I had this vision of getting all my work in before March 31st  so I could have my honors read at May commencement.  I knew it would be a horrible 8 weeks where I would be unbearable to be around.  I don't like me that way, and neither does anyone else.  After some soul searching at 3am, I finally realized my sense of accomplishment does not hinge on graduating with honors.  It hinges on actually graduating.  I've given up a lot since I began this journey back in 2006 or so, when I stumbled onto the English program at Ivy Tech.  I refuse to give up anymore by killing myself to get my work into my instructors in 8 weeks.  So, I'm taking the entire 16 week semester, and will walk in May commencement.

This will allow me time to prepare my applications to multiple MFA programs from here to the East Coast.  My goal in all of this is to be a college professor, and an MFA will allow me to do this without the many, many years it would take for me to achieve a PhD.  Spalding University also has my application, and is need of my writing sample and essays.  Murray University is another option- close to home and much less expensive than most.  Goddard College, the place where the low residency MFA program was born, is my shot in the dark.  They are nationally acclaimed and do not take many new students each semester.  We'll see how this goes.

This plan will also allow me time to actually write, something I've missed quite a bit.  Not only do I need 15-25 pages of fiction for applications, I have unfinished business with a few of my characters.  The mistress is back, and she's ready to rumble.


Tuesday, January 31, 2012

No words...

I find myself without adequate words to describe what has happened in the past week.  What started as a simple arthritic problem for Blitzen ended up taking her life.  A week ago, I never once thought she would be gone today.  I watched Piper get progressively worse for a few weeks, but I knew it was coming.  With Blitzen, though, this was a hip problem, and it would be easily treated.  I didn't expect her to deteriorate so quickly this weekend, and to not be able to walk or eat at all. 

Last night was horrible.  She was restless, and whining.  After moving her into our bedroom, I hoped her pain meds would kick in, and she'd be able to sleep for a while.  After a trip outside (where she could not stand) and a few laps of water, I settled her down on the floor, kissed her head, and told her to get some sleep.  At some point around 3am, I noticed it was quiet, and hoped she was sleeping.  I think in my heart I knew she was gone, but my sleep-deprived brain didn't register that until this morning at 6am.  I was awoken by Dave telling me she was gone.  The tears didn't come immediately, because I was firstly relieved that she was no longer in pain.  The tears came later, when I realized I could still hear her nails clicking on the kitchen floor.

Those who know me well know I am extremely attached to my animals.  It's a trait I've had as long as I can remember.  Blitzen was the first dog we adopted after we bought our house.  Somewhere there's a picture of her as a puppy, out in the backyard as the fence is being built.  HER fence.  HER yard.  Of course, she shared this yard with Piper later, but it was hers in the beginning, and she would chase a tennis ball or a stick that was thrown for hours.  God, I miss her.

We buried her with a stick this morning.  Hopefully she and Piper won't fight over it.

Friday, January 6, 2012

So...I'm going to enter a photo challenge...

....I'm not sure if I'm a glutton for punishment or what, but I saw this post on The Pioneer Woman (amen) and figured I might as well give it a shot.  Goodness knows I could use some improvement!

If you're like me, and love to take pictures but could use some pointers, or a challenge to motivate yourself, check out the MCP Project 12 Challenge!

Monday, January 2, 2012

A New Year, and New Goals!

Last year, on this very same day, I wrote a similar post. Clickie  These were my goals last year:

1. Keep up with homework, without sacrificing myself.
2. Don't let things stress me out so much (see #1)
3. Get out more...with husband, friends, me and baby...doesn't matter who.
4. Read more!  This may contradict #3, but the list of books read this year is pathetically small.
5. Strive to be positive, and avoid being negative, and avoid those around me who insist on negativity.
6. Take my lunch more.
7. Get to work earlier.
8. Post a blog at least three times a week when out of school, and once a week while in school.
9. Write more, and finish at least one started story this year.
10. Give more.

Yeah....some of these didn't happen.  But, I can happily say some did, for the most part.  


1. Well, I did and I didn't.  During the first semester, we lost Piper and I got behind while taking care of her in her final days, and moreso after she passed and I dealt with my grief.  The second semester started out okay, but then we all got sick in October, and that threw another money wrench into things.
2. Yeah, I got pretty stressed a few times in 2011.  I'm not gonna lie...
3. Did I get out more...sorta. The last half of 2011 found me buried under homework, but I think we did more things this year.  It's easier to take Caris out and about now that she's gaining an understanding of things.
4. Regretfully, I did not read more.  I'm not sure how much I read, but it certainly wasn't more.  I did read 5 novels for a class, if that counts!
5. I think I was pretty positive most of the time, and I know I kicked those to the curb who were negative Nancy's.
6. I did this, and then I didn't.  I'm one of those people who like to take their lunch, but can be swayed at the slightest mention of ordering out for Chinese or heading out for Mexican.  Sadly, though, this showed on the scale, and in the final quarter of the year, I started taking my lunch more often.
7. Yeah...didn't happen.
8. Didn't get that done either.
9. Didn't finish a story either.  Many are rolling around through my head too, and it's getting crowded.
10.  This I did do, I can proudly say.  I gave to Autism Speaks and Race for the Cure (did not participate in the walks), held a fundraiser for JDRF and walked in that race, and rang the bell for the Salvation Army on a cold December day with fellow co-worker, book reviewer, and book club member, Lindsey.


So this takes me to my 10 new goals for 2012.  Some are duplicates of 2011, but some of them should be!


1. Have all assignments turned in by March 31, to graduate May 5th.
2. Add more chickens to my flock, for eggs, and help Dave with the meat birds.
3. Books!  Read and review more, and promote the book club more.
4. More blog posts!
5. Take my lunch more.
6. Write more.
7. Start graduate school in the fall.
8. Eat healthier: more veggies, more green tea, and cut out all the processed foods.
9. Keep the house clean.
10. Get my flower and herb gardens tended earlier.


So there you have it!  We'll see how this goes!