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Showing posts from May, 2014

Mothers Day, Then and Now

Those who've known me over 6 years are aware of the issues we had while trying to have a baby.  For those of you unaware, I lost 4 pregnancies in about 2-3 years. What I'm about to say is a reflection on those times.

Mother's Day was a painful day for me for a few years. It wasn't easy to explain my quietness or lack of good cheer. It wasn't that I wasn't happy to celebrate my mom- I was. But it was more for me. It was a reminder of the losses I'd experienced and the frustration at my body for what I believed was betrayal. The worst was when I miscarried just a few days before Mother's Day. The depression was suffocating and my mind simply would not function. My husband had no idea what to do with me while battling his own grief. In short, I began to hate Mother's Day.

Then suddenly everything worked and in May of 2010,  I celebrated my first Mother's Day. There are simply no words to describe my feelings that day. Those years of desolation and …