Tuesday, January 31, 2012

No words...

I find myself without adequate words to describe what has happened in the past week.  What started as a simple arthritic problem for Blitzen ended up taking her life.  A week ago, I never once thought she would be gone today.  I watched Piper get progressively worse for a few weeks, but I knew it was coming.  With Blitzen, though, this was a hip problem, and it would be easily treated.  I didn't expect her to deteriorate so quickly this weekend, and to not be able to walk or eat at all. 

Last night was horrible.  She was restless, and whining.  After moving her into our bedroom, I hoped her pain meds would kick in, and she'd be able to sleep for a while.  After a trip outside (where she could not stand) and a few laps of water, I settled her down on the floor, kissed her head, and told her to get some sleep.  At some point around 3am, I noticed it was quiet, and hoped she was sleeping.  I think in my heart I knew she was gone, but my sleep-deprived brain didn't register that until this morning at 6am.  I was awoken by Dave telling me she was gone.  The tears didn't come immediately, because I was firstly relieved that she was no longer in pain.  The tears came later, when I realized I could still hear her nails clicking on the kitchen floor.

Those who know me well know I am extremely attached to my animals.  It's a trait I've had as long as I can remember.  Blitzen was the first dog we adopted after we bought our house.  Somewhere there's a picture of her as a puppy, out in the backyard as the fence is being built.  HER fence.  HER yard.  Of course, she shared this yard with Piper later, but it was hers in the beginning, and she would chase a tennis ball or a stick that was thrown for hours.  God, I miss her.

We buried her with a stick this morning.  Hopefully she and Piper won't fight over it.

Friday, January 6, 2012

So...I'm going to enter a photo challenge...

....I'm not sure if I'm a glutton for punishment or what, but I saw this post on The Pioneer Woman (amen) and figured I might as well give it a shot.  Goodness knows I could use some improvement!

If you're like me, and love to take pictures but could use some pointers, or a challenge to motivate yourself, check out the MCP Project 12 Challenge!

Monday, January 2, 2012

A New Year, and New Goals!

Last year, on this very same day, I wrote a similar post. Clickie  These were my goals last year:

1. Keep up with homework, without sacrificing myself.
2. Don't let things stress me out so much (see #1)
3. Get out more...with husband, friends, me and baby...doesn't matter who.
4. Read more!  This may contradict #3, but the list of books read this year is pathetically small.
5. Strive to be positive, and avoid being negative, and avoid those around me who insist on negativity.
6. Take my lunch more.
7. Get to work earlier.
8. Post a blog at least three times a week when out of school, and once a week while in school.
9. Write more, and finish at least one started story this year.
10. Give more.

Yeah....some of these didn't happen.  But, I can happily say some did, for the most part.  

1. Well, I did and I didn't.  During the first semester, we lost Piper and I got behind while taking care of her in her final days, and moreso after she passed and I dealt with my grief.  The second semester started out okay, but then we all got sick in October, and that threw another money wrench into things.
2. Yeah, I got pretty stressed a few times in 2011.  I'm not gonna lie...
3. Did I get out more...sorta. The last half of 2011 found me buried under homework, but I think we did more things this year.  It's easier to take Caris out and about now that she's gaining an understanding of things.
4. Regretfully, I did not read more.  I'm not sure how much I read, but it certainly wasn't more.  I did read 5 novels for a class, if that counts!
5. I think I was pretty positive most of the time, and I know I kicked those to the curb who were negative Nancy's.
6. I did this, and then I didn't.  I'm one of those people who like to take their lunch, but can be swayed at the slightest mention of ordering out for Chinese or heading out for Mexican.  Sadly, though, this showed on the scale, and in the final quarter of the year, I started taking my lunch more often.
7. Yeah...didn't happen.
8. Didn't get that done either.
9. Didn't finish a story either.  Many are rolling around through my head too, and it's getting crowded.
10.  This I did do, I can proudly say.  I gave to Autism Speaks and Race for the Cure (did not participate in the walks), held a fundraiser for JDRF and walked in that race, and rang the bell for the Salvation Army on a cold December day with fellow co-worker, book reviewer, and book club member, Lindsey.

So this takes me to my 10 new goals for 2012.  Some are duplicates of 2011, but some of them should be!

1. Have all assignments turned in by March 31, to graduate May 5th.
2. Add more chickens to my flock, for eggs, and help Dave with the meat birds.
3. Books!  Read and review more, and promote the book club more.
4. More blog posts!
5. Take my lunch more.
6. Write more.
7. Start graduate school in the fall.
8. Eat healthier: more veggies, more green tea, and cut out all the processed foods.
9. Keep the house clean.
10. Get my flower and herb gardens tended earlier.

So there you have it!  We'll see how this goes!